The One Thing Stronger than Addiction is Love
When I first got sober, I told people I was doing it for my family. Almost everyone told me that I couldn’t get sober for someone else and that if I tried, I would fail.
But I did get sober for someone else. I think it’s important to consider that when we reach bottom, we may not care what happens to ourselves, but we still care about what happens to the people we love. If we value our children, a parent, more that we do ourselves, we absolutely can get sober for them. If we stay sober, we will eventually learn to love ourselves, and our motivation to embrace recovery will strengthen further.
I Got Sober for Someone Else
On February 16, 2006, I was about to commit suicide. Just before I did, I thought about my brother. I believe that my Higher Power gave me that thought at that exact moment. Remembering my brother, stopped me from taking my life. I abandoned my plan to commit suicide the second I thought about my brother.
I knew that my suicide would hurt him and change the course of his life forever. I was NOT clean, sober, or even sane when I had this spiritual awakening. But, love carried the day anyway. And, instead of dying that day, I got help.
It’s important that I share that I didn’t gleefully run towards recovery. I was furious that my escape route would hurt the people I loved most. But, that’s how miracles work sometimes. I didn’t know if I could stay clean. I was just willing to give life 24 more hours. That’s recovery in a nutshell. Committing to sobriety for another minute, hour, and day and then do that again the next day. Eventually, life does more than just get easier; it becomes more meaningful.
Addiction Fractures Families. Getting Sober for Your Children or Family Offers Hope.
Throughout my recovery, I have seen men and women whose addiction has cost them the right to see and raise their own children. If they do not get sober, bonds break, and healing may never occur. But, when they do get sober, they can reunify and tremendous opportunities for healing are revealed.
Addiction drives a wedge between children and their parents, too. Sobriety offers a chance to strengthen familial bonds. Whether we are teenage addicts or adult addicts, sobriety offers us a chance to find safety and love within the walls of our family (assuming the family system is not abusive or dangerous.)
Get Sober for Someone Else or Find Another Motivator
There are a million reasons why we get sober. Some of us are sick and tired of being sick and tired. Some of us want sobriety desperately. Others get sober through the court system. It doesn’t matter what causes us to embrace sobriety. It only matters that find effective something that motivates us.
Getting sober for someone else is one reason to get sober. Relapsing doesn’t indicate a lack of love; we are battling a disease, after all. I only suggest that it IS possible to get sober for someone else, and that doing so can and does work as a motivator.
Today, my brother knows he can call me, confide in me, and count on me. The thought of hurting him pushed me to get clean, but so many miracles I never dreamed of have transpired as a result. The one I never counted on is perhaps the most important. I now love myself enough to stay sober just for me.
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